Chapter 27 – The Search is Over

The Ruler of the Universe (and the candy store owner) was distraught, all the heroes so far had not only failed to stop the plague of tickle happy tsetse flies, but they also failed to increase sales at the candy store. The scourge of the flies had forced people into hiding, only to come out when in desperate need of supplies and despite their sugary flavor and great taste the treats at the candy store were not in high demand. It had gotten so bad that The Universe (and the candy store) was out of money in their budget to further fund the search for another hero to save The Universe (and the candy store). In fact money was tight all around, the only place with any spare cash was the well funded retirement account for The Ruler of the Universe (and the candy store owner), a source most unacceptable.
News of the ended search spread like butter over bread, and after people sufficiently de-greased themselves they all responded with the same reaction, apathy. At least that’s the reaction averaged from the few people surveyed and extrapolated out. In retrospect it would have been better to survey more than 3 people and a chair and they should have been awake at the time, but those were the people randomly selected and shaping the selection to fit the preconceived notions of how the results should look is downright unscientific. The Ruler of The Universe (and the candy store owner) used this study to convince the populous that the will of the people was in fact to not find a new hero and that anyone who disagreed was obviously in the incorrect minority that composed of only them. This stance was easy to convince people of as due to the fly oppression people rarely had a chance to talk to other people and when one has a rare opportunity to talk to someone one does not was it on a boring topic like politics. With the populous convinced there was no demand for a hero, hoards of prospective heroes desiring to rid the land of the flies trudged back to their homes to accept the fate they apparently wanted.

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